I have a gum lump. Meaning a lump on my gum right over my new crown. It really is most peculiar, it's not a swelling I think, it's a, well, a gum lump.

I'll keep you posted.

So, yesterday I went to see the glorious Metamorphoses again! I know you're shocked, I know I was, that Cynthia and Fran and I only put it off for one week, but I didn't want to keep changing the date and changing the date and then suddenly it closes and I never got to see it again!

So I dragged my ass out of bed and left the house at 8a just like I wanted to. Cynthia was taken aback at the idea of getting up that early, so I told her that she could sleep in, but if she didn't get there at 9.45a at the latest, I would only be able to buy two tickets and I would take Fran in order to punish her!

I got there at 8.30a, but I was not first in line, there was one lady before me, and she was fantastic. She and her husband had gotten up at 2.30a in order to be on the road at 3a in order to drive down from Boston in order to see three shows in two days. They come down all the time, have for years, the guys at the TKTS booth know them, she's a real theatre freak! Her husband was waiting in line for the Topdog Underdog matinee, and she was getting tickets for the Metamorphoses evening show.

We traded stories about shows we have seen over the years, it's really fun to talk to a real knowledgable theatre fan who isn't actually in the theatre! My favourite story she told was about the Harry Connick Jr. musical earlier this year that closed about a minute after it opened. She said that she hated it so much, but that she doesn't walk out of shows, so she wanted to yell to the stage, "I wish you would all die so that I could go home!"

Around 8.25a, I started getting twitchy about Cynthia showing up on time. If she was late, I was fucked, since the people behind me were getting all four tickets to which they were entitled, and my friend from Boston was of course getting two.

She did get there by the time my hysteria was about at its height and chided me for my lack of faith, but hey, I never claimed not to be controlling and obsessive-compulsive, and since I had no way of actually controlling her lateness, I felt as though I wanted to pull out my own intestines. Fortunately, I didn't have to.

We got our tix, then went home for a few hours, then came back with Fran. I was scared that they wouldn't like it, I was scared I had talked it up so much that it would disappoint them, because how could it possibly live up to my hype! I kept glancing out of the corner of my eye at then, searching for any signs of boredom. But they loved it.

We sat in almost the same place as last time, though a couple of seats to the left, which was strangely much splashier than the centre, I got it right in the face during Alcyone and Ceyx. It was wonderful again, glorious, it's amazing how they manage to keep the show so fresh when most of them have been doing it for years and years, but you'd never know, not a line, not a moment is stale in any way.

I've decided to have a crush on Chris Kipiniak, the actor who plays The King Who Fucks His Daughter, not because he is the most beautiful, (that would be Kyle Hall, who plays Hermes and should never be allowed to put a shirt on), nor the most brilliant actor (that would be Eric Lochtefeld, aka That Guy), but because he is the one of all of them who is most likely to be straight.

That looks like he is neither beautiful nor a brilliant actor, and he really is--he's got an astounding body and is clearly strong like bull, he has to practically juggle the girl who plays his daughter, and he's both marvelously funny as the God of Sleep and very moving and believable as The King Who Fucks His Daughter. Also, he's real hot.

Not to mention the fact that he made direct, prolonged eye contact with me at one point, so I can work up a long fantasy starting from that moment, and that's what these crushes are all about, stories to tell myself as I go to sleep. Clearly, I don't need much to work with.

God, I'd love to do this show. Of course, since every single girl has to be thrown around like a paper kite, I not only would have to lose quite a bit of weight, but also height, so it's unlikely.

Can't wait to see it again. In three weeks I'll take Katie for her late birthday present, as she is reading the book for school and was most interested when she saw the programme from the first time I went. I made sure that we were talking about the right show, that she wasn't reading Kafka, but she isn't. I didn't was to hear her say, "That was good, but where was the cockroach? They sure changed the plot!"

After the show, we had a quick late lunch/early dinner, then I went to rehearsal at Harlequin.

I cannot stand this rehearsing in a room too small for the show. You have to time out things by how far you have to walk, and it really makes a difference to your performance! How come I am the only person, seemingly, who thinks that this is important?

I was finally off-book, at least. I ran my lines with Fran before the show, and found that I was, in fact, off book. I love it when that happens, when you don't so much have to learn your lines than you just realize that you already know them. I should have learned them before now, but I am getting lazier in my old age, difficult though that may be to believe.

I'm totally directing the show at this point, I normally am very conscious of decorum, of who is supposed to open their mouths and say what, but at this point I do not care, I cannot wait for him to tell anyone anything, and there are a couple of things that I totally need them to do, blocking-wise, so I decided just to tell them. And I stopped him from doing something that I hated.

Look, this is my show and I want it to be good because I feel as though I am good in it, I'm not going to stand on ceremony. If any actor took over like I have, I'd be royally pissed, but you know what? No actor that I directed would have to take over.

There is no lack of leadership in my shows.

And then last night, we watched my DVD of The Whole Wide World. Fran was dying to see it, as he is a Robert E. Howard fan, and I knew that Cynthia would like it because it is such a moving romance.

I got the DVD on ebay, and was kind of suspicious, since I could find no mention anywhere of a DVD actually existing, but it arrived and it was real. Then I saw a little note on the side that it was made in Canada. I wonder why it was never released in the US? It can't be because it wasn't a hit, there are a jillion crappy, unpopular movies released on DVD every single day, why not this amazing movie?

Katie decided to watch it with us, and I was a little worried that she wouldn't dig it, but I don't see how anyone could dislike this movie, the story is so great and the characters are so strong. Not to mention that true love that never quite connects is something that everyone can relate to. We all yearn, even fourteen-year-olds. Maybe them most of all.

Just like at Metamorphoses earlier in the day, I kept sneaking glances. Do they like it? Are they suffering through it for my sake? But no, they loved it. Almost nothing is more fun than introducing something that you love with all your heart to someone else for the first time. Their appreciation makes my heart as happy as when I discovered it myself.

Lenten entries missed:

Kate wrote two whole entries during Lent! Go Kate! Two entries in six weeks is positively prolific for her! Anyway, she passed the EXAM OF DOOM and then proceeded to stab the Duke of Clarence.

That Kate, what a crazy gal!

Today's horoscope:
Understanding how things are put together matters today. You might engage in fix-it projects or indulge a young person's curiosity.

One year ago today:
Anyway, the movie was wonderful, the movie was swell, and all I have to say is, I'm aging, fat and awkward, where's my Mark Darcy? Or, more vitally, my Hugh Grant and my Colin Firth fighting over me.

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Last Updated Sun 2 June 01:49:09 2002