I am watching Poltergeist, and realizing that the whole opening no longer makes sense, since the days of TV actually ending for the night are long gone.

I can just imagine kids watching and thinking, "Why are they playing the national anthem? Is it some kind of 9/11 tribute?"

So yesterday was a whirl of activity, all racing around Manhattan and New Jersey and shopping and seeing shows and this and that and the other.

First of all, my computer that spends more time at various Gateway Country Stores than it does in my apartment was theoretically fixed, and I begged a ride from Cynthia to go pick it up. She also had an errand to do with Fran in the same direction, so we all piled into the car like the Beverly Hillbillies and drove to Paramus.

The first stop was Cynthia's errand at the leather store. You see, for her birthday she was buying herself a pair of cowboy boots, and there was not the slightest bit of a point of buying the most expensive pair of footwear that she had ever even considered if Fran wasn't going to think that it was sexy, so he needed to vet them.

The leather store was just fine, smelled great, had a combination of cowboy and motorcycle gear, and just tons of great stuff. I fell madly in love with a pair of short black non-cowboy boots with chains, very Novelle Justine, that I did not buy because I did not in fact have a spare $120 available.

Cynthia was dithering between a pair of brown and black and plain black boots, both Fran and I voted for the black ones, which were the most beautifully made, and thus the most expensive. Fran grabbed a black leather bra for Cynthia that was pretty hot, and on his way out, was eying a pair of chaps.

FRAN
Chaps! Now those are the most kinky pants in the world, because you don't have to take them off to fuck.

ME
Black leather cowboy boots, $225. Black leather bra, $50. Black leather chaps, $200.

FRAN
Being able to fuck your wife while she is wearing all of these items?

EVERYONE
Priceless.

CYNTHIA
You should send that to the Mastercard people, or to Saturday Night Live, it's too good to waste!

ME
It's not going to waste, it's going in an entry.

CYNTHIA
Okay, I'll tell my Dad not to read that one.

After the leather shop, we went to Gateway to spring my computer.

The DVD player hadn't been working on 50% of the DVDs that I would attempt to play in it, so I brought it in. When I picked it up, though, they just had cleared something off that had half-installed itself and didn't charge me a dime! I hate these goddamn DVDs that want you to install its software and then screw up what you already have.

We rushed home after that to get to the matinee of Much Ado at Love Creek. We didn't get there on time, but we had only missed the first couple of scenes. The audience was tiny, which pleased me, because I am a valued audience member and I like to be where I am useful. And after the show, every single cast member thanked me for my laugh, so I was useful, you see.

The funniest thing as far as I was concerned was practically as soon as we came in, in a dancing scene where Wende and Jed were dancing together. What happened was that she tapped him on the shoulder, and then he, being about a foot and a half taller than she turned around and looked over her head like he couldn't see her.

This was a gag straight out of the show that I directed them both in, If Billy Had Been Earnest, and it made me yelp when I saw it. Wende told me that they expected only the cast of Billy to particularly react, and when Kitty and Tracy had been there opening night, Kitty had audibly said, "O Gawd!" at that moment.

Anyway, this production was quite enjoyable, with Jed and Joannie beautifully playing Beatrice and Benedick. Not only do they work together great, but they are each perfect for the roles, which is a rather unusual occurrence.

Wende was really good too, as were Kirsten and Kelly and especially Geoffrey as Leonato, who just kicked out the jams like you would not believe. Also, he looked gorgeous with a beard. The performance and the beard were good enough for me to forgive him for being the Dressing Room Nazi!

My only problem was with the accents. Nearly everyone used their regular American accents, which only makes sense, since the show takes place in Italy, there is no point in doing British accents unless you are, well, British. Nearly everyone, I said, because a couple of the actors randomly did. Don Pedro for one, and Don John for two, but that could make sense since they are royalty. It was when the Friar came out and was doing an accent, and a dreadful one at that, that I started cutting off strangled cries.

Cynthia was laughing at me afterwards about my little noises, but honestly, it was more than a person could be expected to endure quietly.

Last night, in order to prepare for The Elephant Man today, we watched Jesus' Son on video.

I flat out adore this movie, it made my Best Films of the Year list in 2000. Everyone else started loving Billy Crudup as the golden god in Almost Famous, but to me he will always be sweet little Fuckhead. There's so much I had forgotten, too, Holly Hunter's scenes, and Denis Leary's and Dennis Hopper's, but not Jack Black's. I could never forget Jack Black.

My two favourite lines are "They are hurrying through the night to join us!" and, "He's the one who first started calling me Fuckhead." "Well, that's a name that's going to stick!"

At the end, Fran gave it the ultimate compliment, "So many movies like this you are desperate for them to end, but this one I wanted to go on longer!" You really want to continue on the journey with the character.

Not to mention the fact that it is one of the best anti-drug movies ever made, not because it's preachy, but because it makes it look really gross.

And do you know what today is? My six year anniversary of doing this journal, that's what! My life would be a poor, unrecognizable thing without it, to be certain.

Lenten entries missed:

Secra planned what to do if she won the lottery, made the best chicken parmigiana in the entire world monotony diet, was tortured by a closet door, remembered a green-walled nursery, played the what-if game, made it to the top of The Moraga Hill, and re-ran a beautiful tribute to her mother.

Today's horoscope:
You are striving to balance work and play within your relationships. Don't go overboard with impulsivity or discipline.

One year ago today:
We'll see when I get the film back, but since I took seven rolls, there should be one or two frames out of the 252 that I shot that don't make me physically ill. One can only hope.

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Last Updated Mon 13 May 01:17:09 2002