12 March
So yesterday I was doing my second check run all by myself, and The Raccoon screwed me again!
You remember last week, I was almost through the thing, I was only $1000 over, when she suddenly remembered a $600,000 invoice that needed paying. Of course, we ended up not paying it, but not paying alot of other things as well in case we would be made to pay it, and then yesterday I was putting the run together, subtracting things and subtracting things, and getting closer, and then she said, "O wait, I forgot about that $150,000!" Aargh!
I started out with a four foot long tape and ended up with a two inch long tape. Not a joke, it really was! My run was 8 checks long, and I was still $120,000 over, but nothing could be gotten rid of, it was all things like the Amex bill and the rental cars and so on.
I was tearing out my hair and running out of tape for my calculator, and The Raccoon was just giggling away merrily.
"You know how much I'm enjoying this, don't you?"
"Yeah, I can tell."
"Now you know what I've been going through every week for the last three years!"
"Well, next week's check run is going to be great, it's going to be easy, I'm going to be able to pay everything, and you are not going to take it away from me, I'm going to do that check run, too!"
"I'm not going to fight you for the privilege!"
Heard on the premiere of The Colin Quinn Show last night:
"Today is the six month anniversary of 9/11, and, uh, y'know, obviously alot of people here lost people, we all knew people, and people have stories, if you were down there you have stories, however if you weren't down there and you were just in the tri-state area, you don't have a story and nobody wants to hear your hypothetical heroic story of what could have happened. 'Cause now I have people coming up to me and they're like:
'You don't understand, if I had taken the 2 train instead of the A train that day...'
'Do you usually take the 2 train?'
'No, I've never been on the 2 train.'
'You're right, I don't understand, what exactly did you do?'
'No, you don't understand, if I'd decided to become an investment banker instead of running the go-karts up in Utica...'
"And everyone's a psychic that day, too, everyone's a psychic, everyone's all "Something told me not to go downtown," the news, that's what it's called. It's also, Giuliani was a big hero for 9/11, and people forget before, now everyone loves Giuliani, people hated Giuliani, they were like, 'O no, he racially divided the city.' Yeah, thank God he's gone and we can go back to the racial unity we all enjoyed before Giuliani. He really was the whole thing. He must have been mayor of all the cities."
Today's
horoscope:
You're conscious of the rules at work. Don't inhibit yourself, but do take advantage of knowing exactly how far to push in achieving your aims.
One year ago today:
If I ever get to be on one of these shows, remind me to keep a look of enchantment and wonder on my face at all times, because the second you look bored, they point that camera in your face.
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Last Updated Wed 20 March 23:25:09 2002