11 March
I have finally discovered the greatest McDonald's in all the land!
Not the one with the whore as Employee of the Month, but another one on the way to the new office. And why is it the greatest McDonald's in all the land? Well, I went in there yesterday and I wasn't wearing my watch and they were still serving breakfast and I looked at the clock and it was 10.45!!
In case you're unaware of the fascist McDonald's policy, breakfast is over at 10.30, no matter what! You don't want a cheeseburger at 10.30? Too damn bad! If McDonald's says that 10.30 is lunchtime, then 10.30 is lunchtime, dammit! So eat up!!
This McDonald's has apparently decided that only a crazy person would want a Fish Fillet Sandwich before noon (or, in fact, ever) and they don't want crazy people hanging around their store!
You know what I can't figure out?
How do they keep getting guests to be on the Jerry Springer show?
Not the guests with the Secret, but the ones who get surprised. How do they get them to come all un-knowingly on the show?
You'd think that tribesmen from the Kalihari desert know by now that if your significant other comes up to you and says "I have a great idea, honey, let's be guests on the Jerry Springer Show (or Ricki Lake or any of those white trash extravaganzas)!!" that the correct answer is not:
"Sure thing, sweet pea! Doop-dee-doop-dee-doo...", but instead is:
"No no no no no, you tell me NOW!! Are you really a man? Are you sleeping with my brother? My sister? My brother AND my sister? Are you my brother or my sister? Which is it?"
A little more alertness on the parts of the duped spouses could result in these shows being canceled within a few weeks!
C'mon, America, get it together!!
Olana, currently being fucked over royally by Xoom, can now be found here.
Hey hey hey, looky what I got!
I thought I had managed to get over my intense award-sluttiness--you may have notice that I have taken down my awards pages! But this, this is really cool!
Go see Subverse!
One year ago today:
Ears, noses and nipples were good enough for us!
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Last Updated Thurs 7 May 13:44:09 1998