So I'm finally breaking down, and to celebrate the end of the month I'm doing one of these lists for Renee's Page of Listy Things. It's sort of a companion to my secret bio page, I guess.
Warning: it's hideously long.

My favourite Elvis Presley song is His Latest Flame. My second favourite is Suspicious Minds.

The worst thing that ever happened to me is when my father died.

I have bowed legs and knock knees. Yes it's possible.

I have a hole in my nose. Not the piercing, but on the side of my nose. It's kind of like an enlarged pore. I've had it for a couple of years, but my dermatologist told me that he could fix it by taking a punch graft from the back of my ear and patching it like a tire. Personally, I'd rather have the hole.

I went to grade school with Crispin Glover.

I have no chin. None. I'm not kidding.

I have a thing about eyes. I'm always afraid they're gonna be poked out.

I honestly have no idea how big my breasts are. Bigger than 38D, I know that, but I wear stretchy bras so I can squeeze into a 38D. No fucking underwire for me, baby!

I think that large breasts are vulgar.

I swear almost more than anyone I've ever met.

I'm shy. To the point of catatonia.

I am solidly loyal.

I am a terrible creature of habit.

I want to marry Randy Newman. If not him, then Tommy Lee Jones.

I tend to think that I'm smarter than everyone else. I'm not, by a longshot, but I sure act like it.

My favourite movie is Les Enfants du Paradis.

The best TV show ever was Twin Peaks. Then The Prisoner.
No arguments.

I am not visually oriented (odd for a photographer). I can get very strong pictures in my head, but if someone is describing something to me, a layout of a building or directions somewhere, I can never picture it. But if you tell them that, then they just try to describe it harder, so I just pretend to understand.

When I was 15 (I think) I sprained my ankle eight times in six months. Once I sprained it just by walking down the street.

Sometimes I pretend I'm on a talk show and interview myself.

I am a jealous, spiteful person.

In answer to the question of the glass, I think that the glass is neither half-empty nor half-full. The glass just is, I feel no need to define the glass. I know perfectly well that that sounds like a load of horseshit, but it's true.

If I could only eat one meal for the rest of my life if would be McDonald's breakfast (hash browns and sausage biscuit), Pepsi, and key lime mousse.

I was terrified of vampires as a child.

When I was a kid I wanted to be a boy more than anything. I never wanted to be a man, though.

I have never even seen cocaine. And I lived in Greenwich Village in the early eighties. I don't know what I was doing with my time.

I am obsessed with weddings and babies. I fully expect this to continue until I have a wedding and a baby (preferably not simultaneously).

I want to move to Woonsocket, RI. I have never been to Woonsocket, RI, I just love the name.

I had a boyfriend try to kill me once.

I have had sex with six people in my life. I started at 14 and now I'm 33. Clearly, I'm wasting time like nobody's business.

I have a black thumb. Black as coal. I kill plants by walking by them.

I have birthmarks on the small of my back. When I was born, the cord was wrapped around my neck, and I ended up with red marks on my face and back. The doctor told my mother that the ones on my back would fade, but not the ones on my face. Fortunately, he was entirely wrong, though the marks on my face would re-appear when I cried until I was around ten.

My face was ripped up by a dog when I was nine. You can still see the scars if the light is right. I'm not afraid of dogs, though.

My feet are enormous.

I never floss.

I always wear flats and I never wear pantyhose or makeup.

I get called sir at least once a week.

I often feel like the biggest, clumsiest, most heedless thing in the room. This is because I usually am the biggest, clumsiest, most heedless thing in the room.

I cry at movies and TV shows easier than anyone I know. I have been known to cry at commercials.

I've always been the kind of person whom freaky people think is straight and straight people think is the biggest freak around. Greg calls that being a downtown girl.

My favourite thing in the whole world is reading. This is why I like the web so much--to me it's just book after book that never ends.

I want everyone to love me best.

I am obsessed with Iago in Othello. His name is tattooed on my chest with a heart around it. And no, that was not a joke.

I cannot eat bananas, cantaloupes, other melons (but cantaloupe's the worst), egg yolks or liver (except for chopped chicken livers). Not won't, can't. Even with a gun to my head.

I'm anal retentive, obsessive compulsive, sloppy and forgetful.
And no, those traits don't contradict each other.

I have asthma (self-diagnosed, so maybe not), chronic bronchitis, I wear glasses, am hard of hearing, have almost no sense of smell, and I'm dyslexic. I think I should be recalled.

I have no sense of direction.

I can't tell left from right.

I'm left handed.

I think those last four facts (including the dyslexic thing) are inter-connected.

I am a born and bred union-supporting liberal democrat.

I am one of the few people my age with a working knowledge of the blacklist, even though my parents were never blacklisted. That's how into the bone that was if you were an actor in Hollywood in the fifties and sixties.

I am a very fast typist, but I only use my left hand. If I use both hands, my speed is cut in half.

I can always see the other side of every argument, and can easily argue it whether I agree with it or not.

I am very very fair. Not in colouring. Well, yes, in colouring, but I meant in terms of justice. I don't think that the rules should change according to whether you like a person or not.

Sometimes I think I'm British, even though I'm American.

Sometimes I think I'm Jewish, even though I'm Catholic.

I do not believe in converting. Religion, I mean. I think that a person can change religions as easily as they can change their skin colour.

Some days I'm the mickiest mick you've ever met, but my friend Fran Callahan is always just a little mickier.

I don't speak French, though it's my mother's first language. I may never forgive her for that.

I'd be a compulsive shopper if I had more money.

I am always covered head to toe in cat fur and cat scratches.

My favourite colour is green.

I can't use tampons. They hurt.

I am as territorial as a junkyard dog. I don't like people touching my things or looking at my things or breathing on my things. In fact, you're way too close to my things, you go over there. No, farther. I'll be over here with my things. You may be able to tell that I have developed the whole only child selfish thing to an extreme sense.

I was raised an only child, but I am actually one of four. My father was married before my mother and they had a boy and a girl, and the oldest, another girl, who was born dead.

I don't actually know my brother and sister. I only met them when I was eighteen.

My mother has a half brother and sister. My father had two half sisters. I have a half brother and sister. It's a tradition.

My father was by far the youngest of his siblings and I am by far the youngest in mine, which means that I have a first cousin in her late sixties.

The best day in the whole world is my birthday, and the second best day is Christmas.

I don't have sex. Ever. And why don't I have sex? Because (and don't tell, it's a secret) nobody wants to have sex with me. That's why. And I don't want any stupid e-mails offering, because fuck off, I don't need your fucking pity. Now why do you suppose a sweet-natured girl like myself can't get a date?

And I think that's more than enough...That is without a doubt the most self-indulgent entry ever!

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Last Updated Tues 12 May 20:15:09 1998