Now yesterday, as opposed to Saturday, I did simply scads of things, but I really want to take care of the rest of these goddamn catch-up entries, so I'll have to tell you tomorrow.

31 December

Did more searching for a book to use as a five year diary.

Mom and I went to bookstore after bookstore and I stood there counting pages, but the biggest one I could find was around 320 pages, which isn't anything like enough. I had the idea of getting an appointment book, but it had to have a full page for each day, and every one I found had half pages on the weekend days, which doesn't leave anything like enough room to split into five bits.

That night I watched Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve with Mom at home. How unusual. I heard on the radio that people find New Year's Eve depressing because of the pressure to have a date to kiss at midnight. I am 33 years old and have never had a date on New Year's Eve! I figure if someday I do kiss someone at midnight (who is not related to me), that'll be the one that I stay with forever.

1997-year in review:
1997 did not start out brilliantly, what with my Da, my cat Rhubarb, and my friend Diane dying, so that pretty much shot January through March right there. I directed Naked Mole Rats, which was good, and I met The Candyman, which was good and bad. This page really took off and I was written up in the Village Voice and Yahoo Internet Life, and I got my photographs into a Soho gallery. I didn't lose a significant amount of weight, but neither did I gain a whole lot, so that's okay. I moved to Jersey. I worked at The Company That Must Not Be Named. I did not have sex for the seventh consecutive year.

I am not going for the record goddammit!!

My motto for 1998: Take pleasure in small things.

1 January

I was forced to go to my mother's friend Craig's New Year's Day party, an extravaganza of party games and other such horrors. Everyone had to wear a hat. I really solidly did not want to go, not one little bit I tell you, but I ended up having a pretty good time, against my will. Mostly because I was left alone to happily read and drink soda in the backyard in the sun. And I did end up playing the games, though I didn't win any prizes.

There were these two really great girls at the party, Rebecca and Courtney, who were pretty and smart and friendly and nice and fun and sixteen years old. I was thinking about it afterwards, and it hit me that these girls were born in 1981. How can people born in the '80's nearly be adults? This year, people born in 1980 will be able to vote! I am almost old enough to be these girl's mother!

I felt about a thousand years old.

2 January

Two more tries to get the five year diary, and finally, at Staples, I found an appointment book with a full page for each day! And each page is 25 lines long, which makes it very easy to split into five bits. So I wrote an entry for the day in question as well as the day before and I was off to a slamming start! And as of today, I'm still writing in it every day! Only 1799 days to go!

Also, I went to the eye doctor. The funniest bit was when I had my chin on the chin rest and he said "Okay, just put your forehead right up against the rest, and to help you I'll just put on these straps" and he casually straps my head tightly into this frame. I said suspiciously "You're gonna turn my eyelids inside-out, aren't you?" and he said "My, you have a good memory!" Then he told me to look at my thumb and not think of anything else but looking at my thumb and I said "How the hell can I do that when you're turning my eyelids inside-out?!"

The toughest part of the eye exam is when he's shining the bright light in my eye and saying very quickly "Okay look up to your left now up centre to your right your right ear your right elbow look at your right foot look straight down at your left foot left elbow left ear look at my ear" and I'm trying to remember which is right and which is left.

Before the eye doctor we went to Target to replace the purse that broke at Disneyland. I needed something bigger, and the only one that was big enough was a bright red canvas bag with Pooh and Friends on it. I guess they figured that the only reason that anyone would need such an enormous bag would be if they were a mom.

This is long enough, baby. More tomorrow.

* Yesterday / Index / This Month / Tomorrow *

E-Mail

Logo by Lucy Huntzinger
Graphics by The Lady

This page was written by hand. My hand. Only pussies use HTML editors.
Last Updated Tues 12 May 20:15:09 1998