Well, I cleaned up my apartment last night.

Notice how I didn't say "cleaned"; cleaned up means that it is in fact cleaner, but not actually clean. I did however sweep up my weight in dust-bunnies (lucky I lost those nine pounds, eh?) and got a massive asthma attack for my troubles, which is one of the many many reasons that I rarely clean. If the dust is on the floor it doesn't bother me at all--wafting around in the air is another story. And even if the Candyman stands me up again today, I'll have gotten something good out of it.

Space to walk in.

So I got a call from a company asking where the check was and I discovered that we had sent it off to the wrong company, one formally affiliated with the one to whom I was supposed to send the check. So I told the guy to call the wrong company and see if he could get the money out of their hide and I'd call the bank and see if the check had been cashed.

It had in fact been cashed, and I waited for the guy to call back and say that he didn't get anywhere, but instead about an hour later a woman from the wrong company rang and asked me to fax her a letter authorizing payment and she'd send them their money right away.

I swear to God, I practically fainted.

Diane was eating a mango at her desk and was talking about how much she loved them and all and I was looking suspiciously at it and said that I'd never tasted one but it looks like a cantaloupe and I hate cantaloupes. Well, Diane, the Mango Missionary, cut off a piece and practically shoved it down my throat.

And it was wonderful! It wasn't anything like a revolting old cantaloupe, it was like a tangerine without the pulp! You don't understand, I'm a ridiculously picky eater, and for me to even try something that I've never eaten before, let alone enjoy it is...is...almost unheard of!

The hygienist at my dentist's office is named Gumb. I thought that was apt.

One year ago today:
So, Gwyneth, what're your views on the welfare reform bill?

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