Since I dreamed about my man Tommy Lee Jones on Thursday night, I thought that I'd best go see Volcano if I didn't want my subconscious to bonk me on the head. So, I went to the Ziegfeld (best theatre in New York) after work. And I loved it!

Of course, the key to loving a movie like this is to turn off your sense of reality entirely, because if you start to think, you're lost! Fortunately, Volcano moves at such a quick pace that it doesn't give you a chance to go "Hey, wait a minute!" (except for a really lame plea for racial harmony at the end that drew howls of derision from all races and creeds in the audience--which means, I guess, that it worked!), and it really is a joy and a treat to watch Tommy Lee charge around and save L.A.

I've said it before, but it bears repeating: I would crawl over broken glass from here to Rhode Island to give Tommy Lee Jones a blowjob.

John and I are in charge of the postage machine, and people just leave their mail there for us to run through and take out to the post box, but what I want to know is this:

Why would someone leave an envelope saying "No postage necessary if mailed in the United States"? Is it that they are completely stupid or that they are too bloody bone idle to take it across the street to the post box themselves?

In my office, it's a tossup.

There is this girl where I work that I cannot stand, and she's always coming into my room and looking around and saying "This is a great room!" Like I'm gonna invite her to move in or something.

Not in this lifetime...

I listen to this oldies station every day at work and mostly it's cool, but sometimes something just pulls me up short.

I am sorry, but Born in the USA is NOT an oldie!

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